• Dorothy Hayes

Pick Your Friends Like You Pick Your Fruit

Updated: Aug 10, 2020

Think about it…the people you spend the most time with have a major impact and influence on your personal success. It’s easy to tell where most people are going to end up in life simply based on who they pick for friends. Consider it for a moment; the books you read, movies you watch, conversation you are having, income levels within your group. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if our first picks could be the only time we would have to pick? Well, unfortunately, life is not like that.

Regardless of how many close friends you may boast about, you have to evaluate your relationships when you are ready to make a change for the better. Relationships are like elevators; they are either bringing you up or taking you down.

Every connection is not meant for the long haul and sometimes we find ourselves holding on to toxic relationships that expired years earlier. It takes some of us a while to get this one. Now I wonder if this has been the cause of some of my unexplained exhaustion. Hummm….When I think about what my long-term successful life looks like, I ask myself these questions:

Are they highly associated with other successful people?

If you expect to take your life, career, or business to the next level, then you have to associate with people on that next level. Doing this will help expand your mind to greater possibilities. It is natural to feel most comfortable with people who are like you, and that’s OK. However, now and then it’s good to step outside of your comfort zone and spend time with friends who can expose you to greater things, new information and a higher level of living. If you value these friendships, you will soon find yourself advancing too. Some friends may not be in your “next-level” circle of friends, but they also bring great enrichment to our lives. However, the key to balancing your various friendships is to respect and have compassion for all people.

Do you have similar values?

The world is filled with a rich variety of people with various values, beliefs, attitudes and standards. Diversity is great in many ways, however, when it comes to your general values and beliefs, it’s best to keep core friendships with like-minded people. We should respect others’ opinions and difference. Choosing friends that hold similar values to yours will keep you from compromising or being negatively influenced by those that don’t uphold your values and the standards that you govern your life by. Friends having similar values help keep each other accountable.

Do you share common goals?

These are your success partners. When you have friends with common goals, particularly as an entrepreneur, you can push each other. You can work on your goals together and encourage each other in reaching them.

Do they have a thirst for knowledge? Life should be about gaining knowledge, evolving, and progressing. With friends like this, you can learn from each other. It’s always great to have a friend who can recommend a good book or share information with you to help you on your path. People who are avid readers have a broaden sense of awareness, are better thinkers, and generation great ideas.

Are they purpose-driven friends?

Purpose-driven friends are those who you can share your goals and dreams with, and they will encourage you toward achieving them. When you tell your purpose-driven friends what you intend to do, they can help you stay accountable to following through. Allow them to check in on you and ask you about your progress, and do the same for them.

Are they celebrating with you or crab-barreling?

It is a blessing to find friends that celebrate you. True friends are celebrating every milestone, accomplishment and success story on this journey we call life. These friends are genuinely happy to see you flourish and thrive, being the first to say congratulations!” These types of friends are rare so when you find them, keep them close!

Do you give as good as you get?

In order to have good friends, you have to be a good friend to others. Rarely will you be disappointed when treating others as you would want to be treated. You will find your friendships gratifying and worthwhile.

So… where do you pick your fruit from?



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